Hey, y’all! Hubby and I brought the flu bug back from Texas so it’s been a very long week here at Hansen House. But I missed you guys too much to stay away any longer. Plus, it’s Monday, and it’s just a rule that we start our week off with a laugh here at More Cowbell.
Guess what the irrepressible Gloria Richard brought to DFWCon for me??
Besides the Handerpants. Yep, I’ve now got one sassy pair of those!
[That’s me and Jess Witkins below. She’s one of those wild ones. (Here’s her account of the conference with some more photos. The comments are Fab-O.)]
But that’s not the funniest present Gloria brought me. Oh, no siree. Do y’all remember the famous OMG post? (That’s the one about living with Oversized Male Genitalia.)
Well, she brought me THE BOOK!
This thing ROCKS, and I had to share a few snippets with y’all so you could share my joy.
Hubby and I browsed all the chapters on the plane. It’s a long ride from Texas to California with a tired toddler, and we deserved our giggles (especially with the flu coming on).
My favorite is still Chapter 1 ~ You Are Not Alone: Huge Penises in History.
Check out this snazzy opener:
There are some men who have achieved huge things despite their huge penises. Your high school history textbooks probabably didn’t mention their OMG. But, the truth is, in front of every one of these great men was a great big penis.
For example, Benjamin Franklin:
Many of Franklin’s inventions were inspired by his enormous phallus, including the lightning rod and bifocals, which allowed him to see both the tip and the base of his penis at the same time.
Then there was Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart:
Mozart’s obsession with music began at a very young age, when he realized that sitting at a piano helped conceal the massive bulge in his pantaloons.
Leonardo da Vinci:
Why is Mona Lisa smiling awkwardly? Because, as Leonardo later recorded in a journal, “that devil had, unbeknownst to me, slithered forth from the safety of my stockings as I painted her.”
And finally, Sigmund Freud:
The pain young Freud felt was so severe that he invented modern psychoanalysis to cope with his own troubles.
That last one explains a LOT. “Hysteria” indeed.
I’m still reading the book in depth, if you know what I mean. I’ll let y’all know if I run across any more jewels. Thanks again to Gloria for the hours of entertainment.
Who is your favorite OMG sufferer above? Do you believe it? Would you care to speculate over which other historical or contemporary men are inflicted with OMG? Go on, make up some great reasoning for us…Lord knows, the book’s authors took a ton of latitude themselves. Enquiring minds always want to know about these things here at More Cowbell.
Happy Monday, y’all!