Wimbledon officials got twisted over several players panties this year. The top seeded boys double players, Zsombor Piros and Wu Yibing, were asked to leave the court and change out of their black skivvies into – wait for it – borrowed white underpants.
(Seriously, y’all, you can’t make this kind of stuff up.)
The whole hubbub is explained in the first minute of this video:
And how do these guys get their head into the game after being publicly sent packing (OMG, these puns are really hard to avoid today) to the locker room for some emergency underpants?
Papers like The Star opened their Wimbledon articles with ledes like this: “Tennis is a game that tests players’ athleticism, precision and mind. At Wimbledon, however, it’s also a test of players’ underwear.”
Yes, I know, it’s in the rules that one must wear white. I hear you. But I’d really think that applied to visible clothing, rather than undies. Did you watch the beginning of that video above?
Now keep in mind, this wasn’t the only undie case that day.
Another young whippersnapper, Jurij Rodinov, scandalized the chair umpire with his blue underpants. (I was scandalized by his man bun.) The umpire called in Lucy Grant, a Wimbledon supervisor, to also peek at this guy’s shorts. She says into her little radio: “Can we have some underwear to Court 18 – boy’s?”
— Ben Rothenberg (@BenRothenberg) July 13, 2017
Certainly, an Undie S.O.S. is how I’d want to be remembered in the sporting world, right? (Geesh!)
My advice to all Wimbledon players:
Go online and buy scads of white underpants. Do it the moment you know you’ve qualified for the tournament. And after the play is over — hopefully no officials have looked down your pants and asked you to change — do this with those boring white undies:
I have an Undie Chronicle I’ve been saving for a while, but this Wimbledon White Undies saga was just too fabulous to pass up.
Are you a tennis fan? What are your thoughts on extending the “all-white dress code” to the players’ undergarments? Enquiring minds love to know these things here at More Cowbell!