
“The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries or the way she combs her hair. The beauty of a woman must be seen from in her eyes…the place where love resides.” — Sam Levenson
A while back, I did a post on 30 Things I’d Rather Be Called than Pretty, based on a post by Oddysey Magazine on this topic. I’ve pondered it ever since. Why is pretty so important in our society? I’ve watched friends age, lose breasts, gain breasts, lose weight, gain weight…and none of it affected their beauty.
It’s changed the questions I ask about perception. How do I want to be perceived? How do I want my daughter to perceive herself?
Throughout her short life, I’ve worked to find other qualities to compliment my child about, rather than her looks. What qualities combine to make a soul shine from a person’s face? What strengths hold them up when the world beats them down?
20 qualities more important than beauty:
1. Badassery
Badassery is a highly underrated quality, in my opinion. It encompasses many other qualities. I read a rockstar book on the topic:
2. Bravery
The dictionary says this means: “ready to face and endure danger or pain; showing courage.” To me, bravery means doing things that scare you.

3. Competence
Think about how annoying incompetence is…at work, at home, or out in the world. Now think of the glow that comes with competence. Those are the people you want to hitch wagons with, whether it’s a scavenger hunt or something much much bigger.
4. Confidence
Who doesn’t want to be confident? To feel good about their decisions. This is a quality that will elevate you to greatness if you back it up with competence.
5. Cowbell
Yup, you heard me. Full of cowbell. A person who really uses their studio space.
6. Creativity
Creative is fun. Creative ROCKS. Creativity is what most of us strive for. Why just settle for “thinking outside the box,” when you can walk all the way around the box and draw cool pictures?
7. Discipline
I dream of being an organized person and organization takes discipline. Discipline and hard work will take you further than talent every time.
8. Dreaminess
Daydreams are vital for creatives, as studies have proven our life satisfaction increases when we dream about those we know. For authors, that’s our characters. I get a lot of creative work done when I take time to dream.

9. Empathy
Everybody has a path of fire they must walk. You might not see it, you might not hear about it, but they have it. People who understand other peoples’ point of view and have empathy for their feelings are beautiful.
10. Flexibility
If Plan A doesn’t work, it’s nice to be flexible enough to go with Plan B. It makes life simpler when you can just go with the flow. This doesn’t mean being a pushover, it means being able to adjust. People who can adjust are more peaceful, and peace shines like a beacon out of your eyes.
Ultimately spiritual awareness unfolds when you’re flexible, when you’re spontaneous, when you’re detached, when you’re easy on yourself and easy on others. ~ Deepak Chopra
11. Friendly
Lots of words go with this – affable, warm, affectionate, outgoing, accessible. Friendly is a beautiful badass word. And who doesn’t want to live a life filled with badassery? (see #1)
12. Hardworking
See #7!
13. Inventive
In the same ballpark as “creative” or “flexible,” inventive takes things a few steps further. Instead of thinking outside the box, you have the ability to think of a new way to use the box. Perhaps an entirely new box might come into being. I love people like this, and they’re the ones you want to be around.
14. Kindness
Every year I try to celebrate World Kindness Day. After the last few months this country just had, I don’t think kindness can be over-emphasized. Be kind, y’all. Be kind whenever and wherever you can. Kindness is beautiful.

15. Loving
As Maya Angelou says, “be a rainbow in someone else’s cloud.” Just love them. We all have enough rain clouds in our lives.
16. Nice
I think people underestimate the beauty and the power of niceness. It’s different from kindness, which often requires more thought and effort. In business, nice will win every time. There’s great books written about the Power of Nice.
17. Nurturing
To nurture is to cherish, help or encourage. Do this with your family and your friends. Believe me, they will pass it on. Do this for yourself . Nurturing will add to the beauty of your soul. That’s the logical place to start, and where most of us fail.
18. Sexy
Some days you’ve just got to wear your hottie pants. Celebrate yourself, and share your sexy with the world. Sexy is beautiful.
19. Smart
Intelligence is grand, but the common sense to go with it is what brings people up to the level of “smart.” I like smart, and smart is way better than pretty.
20. Tough
Some people might call this fortitude. “Mental toughness” is what helps people cope with difficult situations. I don’t mean hard or jaded, but rather having healthy personal boundaries. That makes “tough” the highest of compliments.
“Being physically tough is measured by how many fights you win, but mental toughness is measured by how you react when all the chips are stacked against you, how fast you get back on track when life kicks you in the nuts. Any fool can win a fight, but it takes a person with true grit to never give up when all seems lost.” ― Benjamin Bayani, The Nation
Beauty is kindness. Beauty is courage. Beauty is love.
What says “beauty” to you? Share it in the comments, and please visit the Beauty of a Woman blogfest today at August McLaughlin’s place. She has an “original” BOAW category and a GirlBoner version. This post is a tiny little part of the original category, but I encourage you to visit them all this week.
Go spread some love today, and wallow in your own beauty.
Hugs!
~ Jenny
Here are some BOAW entries from previous years:
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