Undie Chronicles, Vol. 29: Scratch N Sniff Undies

Those of you who are new to More Cowbell might have missed The Undie Chronicles. The regular posse here knows: When the Undie-verse speaks, we will always listen. I had no idea when this began that there were so many hilarious undie-based topics to discuss. Plus it’s Monday, and I like to start the week with a good belly laugh.

I keep my ear to the undie-verse ground, in case anything interesting pops up, if you know what I mean. Several weeks ago, THIS article shows up: Charleville Home Hardware now stocks men’s underwear.

Of course, I want to scope out this hardware store, and also discover where the heck is Charleville, so I can send one of the posse in for a browse.

[Charleville is in Australia, y’all. In Queensland, on the east side of the continent, to be precise. In the county of Toowoomba. Are any members of the More Cowbell posse near Toowoomba? *bats pretty-please eyelashes*]

The article says:

After the closure of Target last year, the Charleville community began to wonder where they could buy the essentials – socks and jocks. 

A number of small businesses stepped up, bringing in new lines and increasing their supply to help the community, and now Home Hardware has done the same.

“We saw the Tradies undies at a trade show last month and thought it wasn’t a bad idea after Target shut down.”

My feverish little brain is looking up “tradies,” the whole time hoping they’re referring to “tradesmen” because undies are a private personal item that should not be traded. 

Lo and behold, there is a whole company dedicated to cladding the manly bits of Australia’s tradesmen. HUZZAH! I rushed off to explore Tradie Underwear and discovered a whole new undie-sphere.

[Not to worry, Ladies, they have Tradie Lady apparel as well.]

But back to the men…

These cats at Tradie have trunk types I’ve never even heard of: Fitted, Bound, Manfront, No Stink, and Big Pouch.

What kind of tradesmen are they breeding over there in Australia?

Perhaps “Down Under” refers to and area I’ve never considered…

Seriously, y’all, there are a plethora of man-trunk choices in Australia. I fear the Americans are sadly behind.

In exploring this new marketplace, I found all the aforementioned brands and much, much more. Finally, I scrolled down to the Limited Edition section, which just says “Coming Soon.” (Lucky bastards.)

Check it out. They’ve got UV Print, which sounds useful, and Bright Spark, which sounds super-festive. And…

Scratch N Sniff underpants? Are you kidding me?

I love my guy. I really, really do. But I don’t want to sniff around his underpants, not even with the “hot dog” or “rad pineapple” options.

You’ve gotta draw  your line in the sand somewhere, and I’m drawing mine in front of the Scratch N Sniff section.

Don’t get me wrong. I think the marketing team at Tradie are right up there with the folks at PooPourri. I give them full points for creative advertising and general naughtiness.

To give you an example, these are some recent Facebook updates:

(You know you’re clicking that link to Like their page.)

But I’m saying “NO” to the Sniffies. I won’t be importing those particular undies here to the West Coast.

What say you, friends? Would you buy or wear Scratch and Sniff underpants? Which Facebook update above is your favorite? Enquiring minds always want to know these things here at More Cowbell!

~ Jenny

p.s. It was a bang-up week over at Writers In the Storm last week. We had an eye-opening post from Les Edgerton on defining characters through action and an amazing post from Gwen Hernandez on the Top 10 Scrivener Features for Writers. Both these generous souls are answering questions.