Last year began with screaming kick-my-ass-pain and ended with me feeling beautiful and bionic. To say it was a roller coaster year is an understatement.
Let me explain.
For years, my right hip has been cranky. It was happy during my pregnancy, groovin’ on happy hormones and Relaxin, and then cranky again within a year. The Hubs and I went to a year of Crossfit and it improved. We took a work break from Crossfit and it got worse. Way worse. Screaming pain and limping worse.
The Hubs finally got me to tell the doctor last February and an x-ray showed some mild hip dysplasia. How could I have lived more than 40 years and not known about this?
We called it “Dog Hip” and I was feeling like a very old and unattractive dog.
By March, I had trouble sitting. I spent April pacing around my house like a wild animal, working with my laptop atop a box on the table so I could stand and work at the same time. I was worse for the wear by May, tired and puffy, with house-bound prison pallor. Fifteen minutes in the car could reduce me to cold sweaty pain.
The MRI diagnosed a labral tear and the doctor went inside the hip in June to stitch it up. It wasn’t just a tear. The labrum was dying, flapping, not holding the leg in the hip socket, and my femoral head was a mess. Dr. Kramer fixed it all and I took a three week spin with “Cruella,” the evil CPM machine. The pain was hideous, but still better than before the surgery.
Yep. Me, crutches and Cruella into July. Me and the flu in July. Me and PT in July and August and September and October. I learned a lot about the concept of beauty from Cruella and from PT.
Beauty is strength. Beauty is perseverance. Beauty is love.
Beauty is family, and the good friends who cheered me up and cheered me on through 4 long months of rehab. Beauty is having a hip that works, and living a life without pain.
August sent me date bars, and GirlBoner lip balm. Patricia Rickrode (aka Jansen Schmidt) sent me wine. Sharla Rae sent an Undie Chronicle gift box. Still more friends sent me cards and songs and funny messages on Facebook.
Who cares that I weigh more? Who cares that I can no longer cross my legs. That gives you blood clots and varicose veins anyway. I can walk and I can sit. I can swim and I can dance.
I climbed a mountain in the Rockies in October. I went back to Crossfit in November. It was baby-steps Crossfit, but I’m doing squats again and it feels GORGEOUS.
When I returned to work in July they looked at me and said, “Wow, you look renewed.” I WAS freaking renewed, to be out of pain after eight solid months.
I still have my own hip and it is bionic. I am loved and that is beautiful. I am strong and so very, very grateful. Love, independence and a healthy skeleton have gone a long way toward making me feel like a goddess.
What says “beauty” to you? Share it in the comments, and please visit the Beauty of a Woman blogfest today at August McLaughlin’s place. She has an “original” BOAW blog hop and a GirlBoner version. This post is a tiny little part of the original category.
Go spread some love today, and wallow in your own beauty.
Hugs!
~ Jenny
That smart lady, Patricia Sands, gave me the idea to list my other BOAW posts from years past. Enjoy!
- 2014: What Are Your 21 Layers of Beauty?
- 2013: Beauty of a Woman Blogfest: Do Breasts Define the Female?
- 2012: I didn’t participate, but was moved by these posts to do so the other years.
Hi, popping in via #BOAW2015 It seems you have had a rough year, but so glad you are now pain free! Onwards and upwards!
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Thanks, Jacqui! And I’m having so much fun today, going through all the BOAW posts. 🙂
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It’s amazing what can happen when we’re forced to slow down and take time for ourselves. Even the worst things can prove to be gifts, if only in the way it gives the people who love us a chance to show it.
You are beautiful both inside and out.
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Awwww, thanks Kitt. It really was a time for me to feel “held up.” My friends and family were all so kind to me. Especially on Facebook, y’all really helped the time go by. 🙂
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Awww, Jenny–you brought tears to my eyes and, of course, in Jenny Hansen style, a smile to my face. Bionic rocks! SOsososo glad you are you.
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Thanks, Amy! And it is a joy to see your smile up there in that gravitar. I miss your face!!
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Jenny, what a year 2014 was for you! So glad you have come out the other side. You are amazing, my friend. Your strength inspires me. Hugs. ❤
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Yep, although I’m still picking up balls from 2014, it’s really been an amazing year of lessons. Still, I’m very glad to see the year in my rearview mirror. Now I’m gonna go run and do some squats. 🙂
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Your surgery may have been worse than my Sharon’s hip replacement, but both are major. She’s coming up on ten weeks now and doing very well. So glad this is all behind you, Jenny. And you’ve always been beautiful to me.
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Hip surgery is rough because you can’t isolate it like you can an arm or a knee. Every time you move your body, you use your hip. That being said, at 10 weeks she’s probably a rockstar by now. 🙂
And thank you, David. You are the sweetest man.
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This is so wonderful!!
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Thank you, Alica! (And p.s. You are breathtaking. I’ve seen pics of you, Piper and DD. 😉 )
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I have chills on my arms and tears in my eyes. What a gorgeous post! You truly are beautiful and bionic. We’re so blessed to have you in the fest. ❤
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August, I feel blessed to be in the fest. Thanks for keeping the BOAW tradition alive. 🙂 I can’t wait till we can get out together again – we’ll see if any other strangers try to hug me.
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Jenny, I’ve considered you bionic since our first virtual meeting … it seems like forever … With your energy, humour, and magnetic personality, you couldn’t be anything less! (Every time they mentioned more cowbell on the SNL 40th show, I thought of you and chuckled!)
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Awwww, Patricia…thank you! Can you BELIEVE the WANAs have been together since 2011? Where does the time go??
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What a year! So glad to be able to sit in sew with you!! A year ago we couldn’t have done that. You are an amazing person, so positive and determined. I’m happy that we’ve connected through writing and sewing! and I can say I have a bionic friend!
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It is so fun, Tari! And you’re exactly right. This time last year, there were many times that if I worked all day, I stood all night because I couldn’t bear to bend my hips. It was awful.
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I have always seen you as bionic, especially in Words with Friends…. Don’t think I’ve mentioned to you that your courage with Cruella helped me decide to give acupuncture a try as I was losing the ability to walk. Our issues are different but when a friend steps up, a friend says, “Me, too!” Thanks, beautiful Jenny. I, too, am walking now, a ways to ago but I am walking.
Karen
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I didn’t know that, Karen! I’m so glad you went and got treatment. There’s nothing like the confidence of mobility, is there? Thanks for being such a grand friend and WWF pal. 🙂
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Jenny, you “Rocked” your BOAW post my dear friend. But now I feel ashamed living so close by that I didn’t bring over more of my chicken soup or something. Yet, you are a survivor and Bionic to boot! So yay for Cruella! Because I know that without her, your rehab would have been much worse and you may have not had such a successful result. Way to go Bionic Woman! ((Hugs)) 🙂
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You’ve got nothing to feel guilty for, Karen! Not only were you dealing with Bill, but I was a crabby bitch while confined to the house. I wouldn’t have been any fun to talk to, I promise.
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Jenny! I adore this post. You ARE beautiful, inside and out. You’re absolutely right: beauty is love, family, strength.. Beauty is gratitude for all of the gifts you have in your life–of which you have tons! *MUAH!!*
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*MUAH* back atcha, Kate! I adored your post too. Belly dancers of the world…UNITE AND WIGGLE.
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LOL @ Unite & Wiggle ~ LOVE that!
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Yes, I remember following you through this process on FB. Congratulations!!
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LOL, Yvette! Yep, you found me some fantastic songs for my Cruella Playlists. That helped so much!!
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So happy and proud of you Ms. Bioinic Beauty. Keep on keeping on my friend. And thanks for the shout out. Here’s to a fabulous 2015!
Patricia Rickrode
w/a Jansen Schmidt
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You too, my fellow insomniac! I love knowing you’re just right up the state from me. Hugs!! And thanks again for that damn fine, and incredibly thoughtful, wine. 🙂
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And you climbed a dang mountain! That’s beautiful stuff, Jenny!
Keep that bionic beauty going. You’re one in a million!
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You should know…you climbed the dang mountain right next to me. Wasn’t it so beautiful up there? We were in a fuzzy fabulous crowd that week. Thanks for sharing the joy, Julie!
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Jenny, my friend, you’ve been on my hip list for a while now, you know that. ❤
Your humor and style and beauty are unmistakeable every time out, through the pain and the rehab and the mountain climbing. And you manange to sneak wisdom into the mix, too. Wow, you. You ring my cowbell.
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*blushing* Thanks, Mark!! The beauty around here today is blowing my mind. You always add to the posse, my friend. ALWAYS!!
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You are so special, Jenny. Your spirit and humor have me in awe. I hope that if i have some medical problem I can handle it with half the grace you did. But I’m pretty sure it would be a daily pity party on FB until my friends list dwindled to zero. 🙂 You are beautiful!!
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While I thank you for the fine compliment, Deb, I think you’re full of the hooey. If you have some crazy medical issue, we will all have a mermaid costume contest on Facebook to cheer you up. No one can stay cranky around mermaids. 🙂
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“The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.”
― Elisabeth Kübler-Ross
You are so beautiful cousin Jenny.
Jim Hansen
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Cousin Jimmy! I’ve never seen that Elizabeth Kubler-Ross quote and I LOVE it. You just made a really great day even better. Thanks! And hug all my Austin peeps, will you? That hip stole the lovely summer vacation I had planned to your neck of the woods last year!
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Yeahhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You go, girl!
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You always make me smile, Cate! Nice seeing you here at More Cowbell. 🙂
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After my Nana got her hip replaced and therapy, she said that felt like she could climb mountains (and that was at 85years old). I can only imagine how good you must have felt 🙂
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That’s fantastic, Amaryllis! Your Nana sounds like a gal I’d love to take a walk with. 🙂
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It has been quite the nasty year for you. wow. I’m so glad you’re feeling better and back to your own irreverent self. I’m glad you’re feeling like the goddess we’ve always known you to be.
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It has been quite a year, Louise. But I wouldn’t trade it for anything. I learned a hell of a lot. 🙂
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Joy is beautiful. In your post, I felt your pain, and thankfully, in the end, felt your joy. I’m happy for you. Thanks for sharing your journey.
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Go You!!! Congrats on the completed rehab and the “new” hip:-)
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The amazing, beautiful, and blessed bionic woman! Go Jenny, go! Thrilled you’re not in horrendous pain anymore. That’s a truly beautiful thing. And please, crossing our legs? So last century. 😉
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Loved the blog Jen. What’s beautiful to me? That’s no brainer. After 18 chemos, I’ve been in cancer remission for three months! I have eye brows again, eye lashes again, hair is getting thick again — and that’s just the outside. Inside, of course is the remission and the emotional high of so many friends who stuck by during the bad times — some did not. So all this is what I think is beautiful.
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Such a painful ordeal. So glad you are all better and feeling beautiful.
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You are such an inspiration, Jenny! I’m so glad this challenging year is behind you. Nothing stopping you now, gal!!
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Wow, Cruella was something. I’m glad you’re on the other side of that experience, but not as glad as you are, I’m sure. Happy walking!
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What a painful year. So glad being bionic ended up making such a positive change. When we are at our lowest physically, we find out who our real friends are because they are the ones who help us heal and cheer us on. I have an artificial disk and it saved my life. I was unable to sit for months on end and in terrible nerve pain. It gave me my life back and it showed me who was really there when things were bad.
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Beauty is family, and the good friends who cheered me up and cheered me on through 4 long months of rehab.- SO TRUE! Where would we be without our loved ones!
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You sure had a heck of a rough year, Jenny. I’m happy that your hip pain is a thing of the past and the vertigo, too. Sheesh! Glad you’re back to cross fit and enjoying life and all its beauty. To me, beauty is feeling a sense of peace and joy and wanting to share it with others who so desperately need it. 🙂
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That’s fantastic that you are back to cross-fit. You are amazing!
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