We had a huge MonkeyButt discussion here yesterday, so technically we celebrated Thoughty Thursday in style.
However, Hubby sent me this video yesterday and it made me laugh. It also got me wondering how many of you would feel like I did when you watched it:
As in, “Lady! Could you yank that damn nail out? It’s giving me the creeps.”
Note: There were no foreheads harmed in the making of this video. This is satire.
What do YOU think of this video as an example of relationships?
For example:
- Are you the fixer in your discussions?
- Do prefer to vent without interruption?
- Do you skip “your other half” and go straight to your friends?
- Or are you so inside your own head that you’d miss the nail entirely?
Have you ever had a conversation that sounded like this? Which side of the discussion were you on? Enquiring minds always want to know these things here at More Cowbell!
Jenny
Jenny Hansen's Blog 
OMG, don’t you just KNOW that this is exactly how guys see it? Poor things…it’s just so clear to them… I’m sending this to Alpha Dog. I’ll report back what he says…
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OK, but do yourself a favor and just send him the video. If he clicks back on the Monkey Butt link, you will be in SOOOO much doo-doo. IYKWIM…
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HI Jenny, I can relate. I maybe trashed two or three relationships because I didn’t listen. I alone now and realize that the video is only 50% right. Too often the woman listens to things that aren’t there, counting on “female intuition”. Some times it’s just plain ignorance that causes discussions about who’s not listening. There are times when communication isn’t the answer. Both sides sitting with their mouths shut and thinking about what they love about their partner.
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I’d agree 100% that it’s a two way street, Tom. My guy says the most comforting thing for him is that I’ll actually admit my own blame. That wasn’t his experience with the gals before me.
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I’ve seen this video before, it’s brilliant! I’ve totally had that conversation too, and I’m the one with the nail in my head 🙂
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LOL…I’d never seen it before, but it’s fabulous. 🙂
Lovely to see your smiling face, Jennie!!
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Most times I miss the nail entirely. Usually it’s the hubs who’s trying to tell me, “Hey, look! Here’s the solution to your problem right here!” But do I listen? Nope. Just wanna vent, vent, vent. Normally it’s not until I’ve calmed down and gotten all the horomones out of the way that I realize he was right all along and then I apologize. Luckily, my guy is so wonderful when that happens because after 13 years, he’s learned to just say, “It’s okay. I know you just needed to vent,” and then all is well again. 😀
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*snorting with laughter* We’re writers, so that “missing the nail” thing is kind of an occupational hazard…
You’re hubby sounds like he understands and loves you very much. 🙂
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Ha! That got a chuckle out of me, too…mostly because I was on the guy’s side. it’s times like those that I’m glad I’m not a lesbian. Women can be WAAAAY complicated. As for hubby and I…we have an agreement. If what I need to do is vent and him to listen, I start the conversation by saying “I need to vent”. Otherwise, we tend to be sounding boards for each other. The rare misfires happen when what he wants is a sympathetic ear (not a sounding board, and not venting) and forgets to let me know…which puts me in analytical/fix it mode. After a microexplosion, I figure out what he really wants and we start over…LOL!
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You and I have the same type of marriage/discussions, Kitt. Which is actually not too surprising. 🙂
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OK – yes, us guys do this. I’ll admit to getting yelled at all the time because I don’t listen. But we do listen – “selectively”. Sometimes I wonder how my gal deals with me. Yet, I agree with some others here that women just need to vent and ignore the solution for a bit. Sometimes it’s better to pretend to listen! 😉
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ROFL. Yep, I’ve watched tons of selective listening. However, I truly think men and women have a lot to learn from just watching each other handle conflict. It’s fascinating.
The best description I’ve ever heard is: “Women bond through sharing problems; men bond through sharing solutions.”
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This is hilarious! I was cracking up the whole time. Probably because I saw too much of myself in her and my husband in the guy. It’s not about the nail! Um, yeah it pretty much is. The next time I want to vent, I’ll think of this and start laughing instead. It’s much more fun and more therapeutic, anyway. Now I have to send this to my husband.
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That’s exactly what i thought, Tameri! Yep, in this ONE instance, it is totally about the nail. But all those other ones… LOL.
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This is EPIC! I was still recovering from your Monkey Butt post and now this! 🙂
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LOL. Thanks. We don’t usually have quite this much fun in one week, but I just couldn’t keep this video from my peeps!
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I’m with Kitt – we have an understanding in our house that you need to preface your statement with “I just need to vent” if you don’t want the other person to fix.
I’m the bigger fixer 🙂
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Yep, me too. Check, check and check!
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Hilarious! I think I’m the one with the nail in the head, but when I’m the listener, I do try to fix. LOL. I’ll try to be a little more understanding now when Joe tries to fix things for me. I wish it was as easy as pulling out a nail!
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Wouldn’t that be great if someone could just balance the back of the hammer against our nose and pluck that offending nail out? But, nooooo…we’ve got to talk it all around until we understand it enough to yank it out ourselves. Dammit.
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That’s funny!
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Thanks, Catherine! Glad you liked it. 🙂
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This is a great video. It was funny and pretty damn accurate.
I have a few problems. Most of the time I am a great listener. I read verbal and nonverbal cues and know when to pay attention, when to speak, and when to touch during a discussion. But, when the other person is under stress, I quite often go into protect mode and start analyzing the crap out of the conversation. My active listening skills take a nosedive once I start to analyze and work towards fixing or saving them from their situation.
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I know your pain, Zack. It sounds like you start reacting to their distress instead of the problem. But isn’t that helper gene of yours part of why you became a G-Man??
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Yes, it’s part of it. It adds and purpose.
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*it adds drive and purpose*
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You’re so funny…you know I would’ve fixed it for you, right? 🙂
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😉 Yes, but I have a bit of OCD in me and I couldn’t stand seeing that there and not do something to fix/change it. 😀
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ROFLMAO!!!!
It’s HUBBY and I!!!!!!! O.M.G!!!!!!!
DYING here…I don’t even know what to say…
PEGGED!! LOL!!
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You’re so funny, Nat. So, really? You’d sit there with a friggin’ nail in your head if you were hopped up?! (I don’t think so…)
I can’t wait to hear what Hubby has to say. 🙂
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Too funny! After watching this, I’m thinking the perfect solution for women who just kind of want to vent, who just want someone to listen…is duct tape. Just before we’re ready to start talking, wind about three feet of it around the guy’s mouth and head. By the time he works himself loose, we’ll have gotten whatever it is we needed to say out, and he’ll be so pissed he won’t care about fixing it. 🙂
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*snorting over duct tape* I want to say there might be a crime associated with this behavior, but I don’t know what they’d charge you with. Unlawful imprisonment maybe? ROFL.
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Hmm. I’m thinking it might fall more into the object lesson category than a legal one. It’s like THE perfect opportunity drive home the concept of ‘silence is golden’. Once it’s learned, you would never have to say another word. When you have a monologue situation going on, just gently toss the roll of tape in the air until you’re ready for a dialogue, at which time you could give the all clear and set it on the table. If what comes out of his mouth that time isn’t what you want to hear, just pick the tape back up and start tossing it again. That’s when you move from silence is golden to think before you speak. It’s actually quite a simple system to teach a man what it is you need. 😉
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*fell over in a heap of laughter*
You are a dangerous lady.
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I am definitely the venter type, but me and hubby rarely fight, thankfully. He’s extremely laid back and very practical. He listens gives his opinion and that’s usually it. If we disagree on something, in the end we usually agree to disagree. Love that video. Have me a good laugh today!
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I love to hear people happy in their marriages! Sooooo glad you could get a giggle too. 🙂
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OMG. This is so true. More so if you’re maried to a scientist like me. With everything, it’s either black or white, no inbetween and he has to analyze a problem and points out the logical fix which of course isn’t a fix for what’s really wrong. Sigh. On the other hand this experience has taught “me” to be a better listner and not to ask questions until all the steam disapates. 🙂
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Oh no…not the scientists!! We call those scientific/engineering types “Spock” and it seems that lady writers are always attracted to them. They balance us out. And perhaps, drive a girl a little crazy… 🙂
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Hilarious video that refects relationships so well. I often miss the nail and when I finally start noticing it, the ache has gotten so bad that I’m really pissy. I’m also guilty of fixing and not talking of issues with hubby but with friends instead. But then sometimes those issues become non-vital when you vent to an outsider. Cooling down and getting some perspective can be good for the relationship. And if the issue is still there, you can work it out with a clearer head.
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“All my sweaters are snagged.” Oh my–so funny!
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Hil-AR-ious!!! Thank you Jenny. The world needs to see this. So many problems would be solved in an instant if people just GOT this 😉
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