Why Do The Simplest Skills Take the Longest to Learn?

Welcome to Thoughty Thursday here at More Cowbell! Thanks to my toddler, I’ve got learning on my mind.

Baby Girl is potty training. And by that, I mean she’s been showing interest in the potty: sitting on it, making us sit on it and (I just found out yesterday) going when she’s at school.

That child (much to my dismay) has been watching me sit on the toilet for months. Bathroom time is now “together time,” rather than the “private time” I’m used to.

Not only has Babykins tried to pull down my  pants (rather than her own), one time she shoved my thigh over so she could see what was going on down in Porcelain Mysteryland.

[Yeah, you pre-kid peeps…you lose ALL your dignity when you’re a parent.]

Then yesterday, I get the report that, as usual, they asked the Little Bean if she wanted to use the potty. As usual, she (emphatically) said “no.”

Then one of her little friends said, “Oh, come on…use the potty with me!!.”

She walked over to where they were changing another child’s diaper, grabbed the Dora potty-seat off the shelf, placed it on the toilet, took down her pants, climbed up and went.

Hubby and I, and her Godpop that works at the school, all started cheering when we heard. You’d think that child had built the Eiffel Tower or discovered the cure for AIDS.

[I’ll just remind you of that dignity thing I mentioned above. Gone…out the door…ka-PUT  the moment you become a parent.]

And I started thinking about all the simple stuff that takes people forever to get.

Asking someone on a date…
Mixing a good drink…
Doing a push-up…

As kids, it’s pretty understandable that learning takes awhile — they have a TON to learn in a short amount of time.

But what about us adults? Does it really take a while to learn all the adult skills, or does it simply take a while to feel confident about them?

How many times have friends of mine:

• Not played a game because they didn’t know the rules, rather than joining the fun and learning as they went?
• Not attended an event because “they didn’t know anyone?”
• Refused to take a turn on the dance floor “because they didn’t know how?”
• Not tried for something like a job or a publishing contract because they were afraid they’d fail?

I can’t even count all the incidents up.

Except for the last one, all of the above just require that you show up and “go with it.” Really.

Photo from Sodahead.com (plus I have this sign)

I’m going to pose a crazy thought. The most common phobia is the fear of social embarrassment, so I’m going with the Fear Factor being the thing that drags us down as we learn a new skill.

Rather than enjoying ourselves as we try something new, many of us worry about whether we look good doing it.

I think for most things, if we were willing to fail at them for a while, rather than be rockstars right out of the gate, we’d get a whole lot further. I am especially bad at being patient with my first efforts on something. I usually want to be “good at it” NOW.

(If you read my last Crossfit post, you know that already!)

What about you? Are you patient with yourself, or are you all “hurry-hurry-hurry” whenever you learn something new? Can you think of something that seemed simple that took you a long time to learn? Will you share it? Enquiring minds always want to know these things here at More Cowbell!

Jenny