How “50 Shades of Hay” Led To The Amish Erotics

Lena rocking a lampshade…

Lena Corazon is a lampshade-wearing instigator of epic proportions. Y’all do know that she was the real force behind several of the Undie Chronicles, right?

Speaking of epic…Friday night’s party at the #myWANA hashtag on Twitter was an absolute blast!

If you weren’t there, you missed a ton of fun, virtual drinks, snacks and jello shots…AND the creation of a new band of back-up dancers called the Amish Erotics.

[Don’t pout. We’ll be having another party.]

Now, before you start shaking your heads about how “Amish” and “erotic” don’t go together, lets’s give you some background.

Our pal, August McLaughlin, is an amazing musician and she’s starting to perform locally around Los Angeles. During Friday’s party (after a couple jello shots and table dances), we got it into our heads to support her act in the form of backup dancing. (Poor, poor August…)

August’s Last Gig – Before the advent of the Amish Erotics (AE’s)

Here’s the chat that led to the gold lame wearing AE’s (you’ll notice Lena kicked this off):

‏@LenaCorazon: @AugstMcLaughlin If I can don glitter and gold lame, I would love to be a backup dancer. @KarenMcFarland_ @JennyHansenCA

‏@Julie_Glover: @lenacorazon @AugstMcLaughlin @KarenMcFarland_ @JennyHansenCA Gold lame? Yes! Yes! (Used to wish I was Tina Turner.)

*We went on for a while, talking about the supreme hotness of Tina Turner. *

Interesting trivia: I believe Tina’s legs come up to my armpits, especially in those smokin’ hot heels. (Whereas I’d go splat during the first strut across the stage.)

Lena Corazon and Julie Glover both spun this gem on the turntable about an hour before the party ended…those ladies were totally in sync.

After watching that, I’m sure you understand all the raving about Tina’s “hottie factor.” I mean, dang…did you see them legs?

Then August opened the door to mayhem:

@AugstMcLaughlin: @Julie_Glover @LenaCorazon @KarenMcFarland_ @JennyHansenCA ~ And you’re ALL hired for my gig. Feather boas provided.

‏@BMcDowellOH: @AugstMcLaughlin I’ll be a remote back up dancer. I just need a cape and glow sticks. @KarenMcFarland_ @JennyHansenCA @lenacorazon

‏@AugstMcLaughlin: @BMcDowellOH @KarenMcFarland_ @JennyHansenCA @LenaCorazon ~ Done, Barbara! I’ll show you on the screen via Skype. S’gonna be HOT.

‏@BMcDowellOH: @augstmclaughlin @KarenMcFarland_ @JennyHansenCA @LenaCorazon ~ Oh yeah. I’m wicked with the glow sticks.

‏@JennyHansenCA: @AugstMcLaughlin @BMcDowellOH @KarenMcFarland_ @LenaCorazon ~ Yeah, baby! The age of technology. Skyped back-up dancers.

‏@RASJacobson: @JennyHansenCA WIsh I could! You have no idea! Would love to support @AugstMcLaughlin!

Then I cracked the door to mayhem a little wider with a reference to one of my favorite Kristen Lamb quotes*:

‏@JennyHansenCA: @lishafink @RASJacobson @AugstMcLaughlin ~ Amish Erotica: 50 Shades of Hay (via @KristenLambTX)

‏@lishafink: @JennyHansenCA Bahaha! @RASJacobson @AugstMcLaughlin @KristenLambTX

‏@RASJacobson: @JennyHansenCA @lishafink @AugstMcLaughlin @KristenLambTX ~ Outstanding. (In a field.)

‏@AugstMcLaughlin: @JennyHansenCA @lishafink @RASJacobson @KristenLambTX ~ ROFL! Okay, that’s the dancer posse’s name: The Amish Erotics.

‏@JennyHansenCA: @AugstMcLaughlin @lishafink @RASJacobson @KristenLambTX ~I could be a member of the Amish Erotics, if you know what I mean. #NeedCap

‏@GloriaWrites: @augstmclaughlin SKA-Weet! I’m part Amish. I can be a dancer, right? No boundaries.

‏@LenaCorazon: @AugstMcLaughlin BEST. NAME. EVER. @JennyHansenCA @lishafink @RASJacobson @KristenLambTX

‏@lishafink: @AugstMcLaughlin That’s probably the one dance line I would fit in. #coveritup @JennyHansenCA @RASJacobson @KristenLambTX

‏@JennyHansenCA: @RASJacobson ~ Waving bye!!!! Now come to the west coast and we’ll all go to August’s gig on 2/20 #DancingQueens  

* In case you’re wondering about the original “50 Shades of Hay” conversation, it happened over dinner last July and went like this:

Kristen: Talking about today’s book market.

Me: Well, you know, Amish romance is still extremely hot right now.

Kristen: Oh, really?? What…like “50 Shades of Hay?”
(Of course the whole table went into hysterics.)

I thought that was the end of that, but I should know better. With these crazy WANA peeps, anything is possible.  Even the “Amish Erotics” in gold lame.

Did you know this much fun could be had on Twitter? Have you ever sung in a band? What was the name of your back-up posse? If you’ve thought of an even better name for August’s back-up dancers, feel free to share it down in the comments. Enquiring minds LOVE to know these things here at More Cowbell!

Jenny