More Cowbell Monday is always about laughter. It’s just a rule around here that we start the week that way. I mean, really…it’s MONDAY. Need I say more?
In honor of the snarling hacking cold wreaking havoc at my house, y’all get something a bit different today: some stellar links and a video representing the finest potty humor I’ve got on hand.
p.s. Leanne (aka Ironic Mom): There’s an implied *if you know what I mean* at the end of that last paragraph, just for you. Truth is, I peppered the whole post with them.
OK, back to potty humor…
It all started when I spoke with one of my gal pals over the weekend. She reminded me of the blog series I did on embarrassing dates. We had contests and everything. Thank the Lord, she hasn’t had any new dates top the awful moment when she found out her dad told a table full of (cute potentially date-able) dudes: “She pees in the woods!”
Yeah, you heard me right. It was a definite low point in her life, though she DID win the Most Embarrassing Date contest last July with that moment. You’re gonna want to peek at that post, but that’s not actually my point – she just pointed me to the topic.
Do others laugh themselves silly over bodily functions?
Or is it just me that laughs themselves into an embarrasing state over these things? (OK, me and our pal Nat.) I’ve busted a gut over MANY of Natalie Hartford’s “potty posts” – she’s a bathroom humor girl after my own heart!
What are my potty post faves, you ask?
Her tips on the 10 Steps for a Perfect Outdoor Pee? (LOVED it!)
The post on Fartriliquism? (Absolutely KILLED me with laughter.)
That last blog spawned this in the comments:
Jenny Hansen says:
I tell you, as the younger sibling to a much taller brother, I suffered at the hands of my sibling (aka the Fart Master). He would sit on my head and let it rip, every single chance he got. It is absolutely VILE to have someone vibrate against your forehead that way.
Ah…but then young Jenny’s mama enrolled her in gymnastics! Young Jenny grew stronger and able to leap sitting brothers in a single bound…
Young Jenny mastered the LEAPING fart, whereby she could run through a room, leap over her brother as he relaxed against the couch with his cereal bowl, and release a perfectly timed POOFTER OF DEATH.
After landing on the other side of him, I’d continue out the other doorway at a dead run. All the better to not get caught and tortured. It was a gift from God, that leaping fart. I’ve lost the talent since then, but at one point I RULED.
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Natalie Hartford says:
O.M.G!!!Well, I have to say, your brother (dang bag whores– can’t trust them) left you NO CHOICE with fart attacks like those!! I mean seriously – did he think you wouldn’t eventually find a way to retaliate? Silly man! That was likely his first lesson in “never underestimate a woman!” Woot woot.I can picture you landing poofters of death with military precision (likely, this is WHAT inspired him to join the Missouri National Guard’s engineering battalion – it all comes back to you baby)!
I am sure the spirit of the poofter of death lives on deep within you…LOL!!!
Then Nat’s Hubby started congratulating me on Twitter for having mastered the “art of LARTING” (Portmanteau of Leaping + Fart). We were practically tinkling ourselves over this stuff for days.
Just in case I’m not alone in my reaction to bathroom humor (absolute uncontrolled giggling), here’s a video I found for you at Big Geek Daddy. Be sure to watch all the way to the end.
Do y’all share Natalie and I’s penchant for the potty humor? Has the “We Are Not Alone” movement extended it’s reach to bathroom jokes?? Enquiring minds LOVE to know these things here at More Cowbell!
Jenny
Jenny Hansen's Blog 
Yes! Potty humor is IMHO an under-rated conversation starter–especially in gatherings where one is trying to separate the “fun” people from the broom-up-the-kaboosters.
This potty humor story is NOT (scout’s honor) one of those “I have a friend who…” ruses. It did NOT happen to me. Most likely because I am afraid of fire and did not learn about blue-streakers until long after my honeymoon.
First, this friend does not drink. I do not think champagne flowed at her reception, so she can not use ‘tipsy’ or ‘toppled’ as an excuse.
For those unfamiliar with a blue-streaker, it is a game most frequently played by boys. The rules are simple. Let one rip and hold a flame to the gaseous expulsion,
My friend was on her honeymoon. First night in the hotel room. What better way to celebrate your nuptials than to demonstrate blue-streaker expertise for your new dearly beloved? When new hubby walked out of the bathroom, she let rip, and held a match near her rear. The gas stream must not have had requisite propulsion speed and distance because the flame went in the wrong direction and set her undies on fire.
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Absolutely not the way a gal plans to have her undies set on fire during the honeymoon, eh? Blue-streaking!! Bahahahaha! That kills me. I’d never, ever have the yen to try that one out.
You’ll be happy to know that NOT ONCE did I think this story was actually about you!!
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One more (short) note. I clicked the links for Natalie’s site and thought “I have GOT to follow this chick.” So, I’m officially a fan of hers, too.
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She’ll be delighted to hear it, Gloria. She’s a kick.
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Woot woot – welcome aboard the insanity train Gloria!! Love to have another giggle in the house…SWEET!
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Farts are funny. Period.
And I must say, I was in awe of your larting skills for quite some time after reading your comment because I, too, had an older brother who thought sitting on me and farting was hilarious. If only I’d known to lart.
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The Larting becomes even safer if you drop or throw objects at the same time – sort of a new take on Rhythmic Gymnastics, Truly helpful with the smelly big brothers.
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Very Funny! I lived in a small village in MN as a kid with a little Finish teacher — salt & pepper braids around the head and mustache included. Her name was Mrs. Hagge or better known as Rudebaggie Haggie. Really she wasn’t that bad but you can imagine the high jinks of 5th graders. We had a kid in class who could Fart At Will. He’d wait until we’d all just gotten yelled at for something. The minute Rudebaggie turned her head, he’d let off a silent but deadly fart. It was a sm. town school so the rooms were small and OMG. Desks scraped that old tile floor to escape and always someone would dump their books etc. He’d still and innocent while his victims got detention slips. His name was William and he was called Bill. So you guessed it, he was Fart At Will Bill.
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OMG!! Fart At Will Bill probably grew up with major issues! Still a nice devious mind on that kid….
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I love me some good IYKWIMs on a Monday morning, IYKWIM. 🙂
With kids, you kind of have to get to the point where you believe bodily functions are hilarious. My favourite was more than 7 years ago…my DH was changing my Twin B’s diaper while I nursed Twin B beside him. He lifted up the bum of Twin A and … projectile diarrhea, all over his black t-shirt. The resulting design was rather Jackson Pollack looking…
Thanks for the linky and the laugh!
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I can honestly say that Baby Girl has managed to keep it pretty lady-like in that diaper of hers. I’m expecting that to change any day but so far… *knocking on every wood surface nearby* (IYKWIM)
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I’ve been converting to DVD old 8mm home movies of my parents and their friends (vintage 1960s), all of whom delighted, it seemed, in displays of potty humor. (Of course, MY generation is so much more sophisticated!)
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That’s why they call it the GOLDEN generation, Joe….I’m sure you’re WAY more sophisticated. LOL.
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Farts are God’s greeting card. No matter your economic state you can bring joy to a room full of people. Actually the more tense the situation the greater the reaction to this joy-inducer. Personally I have perfected what has been termed “The Acoustic Pinch.” It is a method for maximizing the tonal quality of backside bombings. BTW that phrase and method has a patent pending so no backdoor investor theft allowed. Thanks for the laugh.
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OMG DYING over God’s greeting card; acoustic pinch; and backside bombing! LOVE IT!!!
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I completely died over the greeting card too!!! And considering I’m at work today, that is NOT good, dude!! Funny. But very embarrassing. 🙂
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For some time, I was rather opposed to potty humor. It was beneath this very cultured gal. Then I got married and had two sons.
At this point, I have learned to go along to get along. A well-timed fart can bring two junior high boys to their knees with laughter — a pretty sight for Mom (the laughter, not the fart). There are more potty humor jokes in my house now than snowflakes in Alaska. And about a year ago, my 15-year-old cat started farting too. That gray furball lies right next to me in bed and suddenly I’m saying, “Oh my gosh! Shadow! Was that YOU?” And then my children are rolling on the floor in laughter yet again.
Oh yeah, they also love the “books written by” stuff like “Under the Bleachers by Seymour Butts” and “Yellow River by I.P. Freely.”
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Yep, I’d be enduring tons of poofters for a nice belly laugh. The funniest thing about all this is that my hubby and I do NOT share this part of our lives. There’s been like 2 shared poofts in 8 years. Seriously. 🙂
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Did you every notice how difficult it is to type and laugh uncontrollably at the same time? Loved the video – OMG! As the mother of two sons and wife of a husband who was a JEDI Fartmaster it was either laugh or perish. The ability to lart would have been helpful but as I explained to my boys “Mothers don’t fart” and now tell me grandchildren “Nanas don’t foof”. Of course they believe me!
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Patrica, my work here was a success if you too shared the uncontrollable giggles. My husband laughed at me when I had him test read this post because I was almost purple from laughing so hard.
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The Fart At Will Club is well established in my household. No, I am not a member, thank God, but both of my kids are, with my 6 y.o. daughter in the Leader position, hehe.
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Your 6 year-old gal is winning?? That’s AWESOME!!!!
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I LOVE potty humor!! There are few things that will make me laugh more. What a great post, Jenny!
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Thanks, Jess. So glad to know my Cowbell Posse appreciates the Art of the Lart…
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Tears. I have tears streaming down my face. I’m beyond ROTFLMAO!
That Man RATES the wee beasties’ farts. You know, like on an earthquake Richter Magnitude Scale. California would be in the ocean based on some they’ve let rip. Oh, and the older brother sitting on a younger sibling to let one rip…happens ALL THE TIME. Littlest has taken to sitting on the dog’s face! Not to worry, she gets them all back with stealthy silent farts.
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BAHAHAHAHA! Sitting on the dog’s face! That got me rolling – nice image! I’m sure That Man had a good time with this post then. Does the Lart get a 9+ or what?
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Had a friend in my youth who could fart on command (something to do with his diet of cabbage soup and weenies and beans). He was known to drop a SBD in the back of the class and let it waft toward the front with help from an open window. We all thought this was a gas and loved watching the girls wrinkle up their noses when the aroma hit their areas. All this had a downside. Mike could get you when you went into the supply closet to help the nuns. He’d sneak up, drop a pooter and slam the door shut, leaving you to die inside. As with all grat gfts the gods also put the possibility of calamity. Mike had one aimed at the class during a religion class. No silent, very deadly and Mikey taking a quick trot to clean out his tidy whities. An eighth grade morality tale.
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Weenies, beans and CABBAGE SOUP??? OMG, the agony of walking behind that guy…
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He grew up to be a teacher. Wonder how he deals with his little pooters?
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What kills me is the cute little smile that Alpha Dog gets after he rips one, and I complain loudly. Like a 7 year old, caught out. After 3 husbands, trust me — Just because they graudated from Junior High, it doesn’t mean they ever left it.
I know, ladies fart. But have you ever been having coffee with the girls and have someone roll up on a butt cheek and let ‘er rip? I think not.
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Um, no. A girl would NEVER. But we would laugh uncontrollably as someone who did!
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SQUEEE! I read this post this am outloud to hubby and we ROARED!!! Hysterical. Y’all know I did potty humour and our comments and tweeting over that post nearly put me over the top in giggles. Love it. Nothing like fart humour to break the ice. HEHEHE!! That commercial is a total FAV!!!
Thanks for the FAB shout-out and including hubby and I in your post. LMAO!!!
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You are MOST welcome. You two always make me laugh my guts out.
p.s. Did you happen to click the Big Geek Daddy link?? My honey thought that one was even funnier, but I left it out because it was longer. Really, it’s a must-see for you two. Trust me.
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I second Natalie’s SQUEEE and LMAO. What a fantastic post for a Monday—I bet you cured many readers’ manic-dom! My family is big on fluff humor. I’ll let you decode that one… 😉
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Hey, what could be better for a drag-assed tired day than potty humor??? Thanks for the SQUEEE, August. 🙂
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Pingback: Stinky flatulence got you down? No more! – Natalie Hartford
Jenny, Natalie, I just couldn’t post a comment yesterday. What story to pick?
What’s not to love about a fart?
In our house, dinner table talk always turns to toilets, especially if there is a new girlfriend or boyfriend on the scene. We have so many. Nothing like a good fart story to break the ice and make a new dating partner feel like part of the family.
When hubby came on to the scene, it was the ritual of bedtime face farts–or, assurances pillows were recently farted on–that he and my sons bonded.
We have memorable car farts, named for the city whence they occurred. There was the Guelph fart, the Calgary fart, and the yet-to-be-beaten Waterloo fart, ghastly as it was gassy, made even more horrible because of the sub-zero temperature. Roll down the window: Death by freezing.Roll up the window: Death by fart?
We were lucky to leave Waterloo alive.
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