5 Things That Eased My Mind During The Climb Up “Baby Mountain”

Welcome back to Risky Baby Business, our Saturday series here at More Cowbell! If you’re new over here, the previous posts in this series can be found here.

Those of you who are regular readers know that the road to pregnancy was a rocky one for me. We tried and we failed. Due to my blood clotting disorder and history of blood clots, it was not recommended that I undergo fertility treatments. We were told that my eggs were 6% viable and that we needed to give up our baby dreams. After lots of tears, we did.

A few months after we’d digested all this crappy news and climbed off Baby Mountain, I gave notice at my day job. As I told my husband, “If I can’t birth babies, I’m going to stop working a job I hate and birth books instead.” We started making new plans and new dreams.

One month later, I was pregnant.

Does this mean that if you give up, the baby will just arrive in your womb? That’s not what I’m saying at all. Trust me, I know Baby Girl is here by crazy luck and God’s grace. But relaxing sure doesn’t hurt when the climb up Baby Mountain is an arduous one.

As I’ve said before, it’s easy to get consumed and, well, a little crazy when the baby-making is not going well. I wrote a post on getting pregnant a while back for those of you where are interested (the comments were AMAZING).

Now that you know a bit about my journey, you’ll understand why some of the 5 Things That Eased My Mind might be out of the norm. Here they are, in no particular order:

1. The Conception Chronicles: The Uncensored Truth About Sex, Love & Marriage When You’re Trying to Get Pregnant
These gals don’t mess around (and they are funny as hell). They talk about a touchy subject and tell it like it is. I have friends and relatives who have struggled for years to get pregnant without success. Either they can’t conceive or they conceive and lose their babies. It’s a heartbreaking, lonely journey and this book does the best job I’ve EVER seen at addressing the feelings associated with this. If Baby Mountain is breaking your spirit, or that of someone close to you, please get this book.

2. Belly Laughs: The Naked Truth About Pregnancy and Childbirth
Jenny McCarthy is not who I thought I’d ever buy a book from, much less enjoy it. (As someone who used to work with autistic kids, her other books made me terribly unhappy.) However, when you’re stuck with a body that is out of control for 9+ months, it’s awesome to read about someone else who’s gone through it. Especially someone who’s willing to be crass about it.

I do have to confess that when I read her description of her swollen pregnant va-jj (which she described as “two blue twinkies cuddling under really bad carpeting”) I laughed so hard I tinkled AND I started nagging my husband to check the aforementioned area every few days to make sure nothing had turned blue.

3. What To Expect When You’re Expecting
This is the wonderful book that serves as every pregnant woman’s Bible.  My husband and I both read large portions of this book and loved it. However, it seemed there were hundreds of times I looked up something that I was DYING to know, only to read “unless you have a high-risk pregnancy” at the end of the topic.

Were they right to say it? Yes.
Is it one of the main reasons why I’m writing a memoir about high-worry pregnancy? Yes.

If you are in the midst of a high-risk pregnancy, shop around for a wonderful high-risk OB. Your regular OB and the other pregnant women you know will talk your ear off about the local options. Mine was Dr. Tamerou Asrat, and we’d have considered named our baby after him if we’d had a boy – he was that awesome. He’s recently left Hoag Hospital in Southern California and moved to Santa Clara’s Kaiser Permanente. Lucky them.

4. Baby-Gaga.com
I spent a ton of time in the Baby Gaga calendar getting the week-by-week of pregnancy details. I could read it on my phone and I had the added benefit of The Sarcastic Journalist who has an article for each week of your pregnancy journey. We weren’t in the clear to really get excited about Baby Girl until about the 20 week mark so the sarcasm actually helped keep me going.

5. Baby Bargains: Secrets to Saving 20% to 50% on baby furniture, gear, clothes, toys, maternity wear and much, much more!
To people like us who had to wait until the 32 week mark to buy any baby stuff, this book was a godsend. Why did we wait so long? Factor V women like me routinely miscarry well into the second and even third trimester. I knew I’d be wrecked if I lost the baby, but that I’d lose my mind if I had to give away a bunch of baby items. We brought nothing baby-like into our house until we’d passed the 32 week mark and at that point, I wanted to save some money while shopping. This book is what you need to be able to do that easily.

We also have another book by this the “Baby Bargains” author called Baby 411: Clear Answers & Smart Advice For Your Baby’s First Year. Fantastic book for the first time parent!

Other websites I visited often for information were:

• http://www.fertilitycommunity.com/
• http://www.whattoexpect.com/ 
• http://www.babyzone.com/

Did you use any of these resources during your pregnancy? Are there others you would recommend? We’d love to hear about your experience with “Baby Mountain,” even if it was from the sidelines.

Jenny