It’s been a wild week at the Hansen House and we’re completely off our normal bloggy schedule here at More Cowbell. The RWA National conference was in town, along with some of my favorite peeps, and a stomach virus came home from school on Friday (though it took us a few days to figure that out).
If you read my last post, you know we had the perfect setup for a crime here at my place – the blood trail from my trunk meeting Kristen Lamb’s head, broken glass… Though, to be fair, the glass was just a lack of caffeine on her part.
But the adventure started when Kristen first came to town and saw the MASSIVE zucchini I found in my garden when we returned from vacation. She christened him “Harvey” and informed me he’d be a contender for a Tijuana Donkey Show. (I looked up what that is and can I just say: ”Ewwww!)
Harvey got a lot of play over RWA12 week (get your minds out of the gutter!) showing up in the oddest places…
But I had bigger plans for Harvey…
I had my eye on him for a gluten-free, dairy-free meal while Kristen was here and I started to talk to her about it. Only like most writers, we had two conversations going at the same time.
First we discussed that humans have four basic needs: Food, Water, Sleep and Sex.
And then while “sex” was just hanging in the air, I walked into the other room to check on Baby Girl and started thinking about dinner prep.
[You know you walk into the other room and forget why you went there too. Don't lie.]
I came back into the kitchen and said, “You know, I really need to find some gluten-free sausage.”
Kristen choked on her water and said, “What are you doing to your poor husband?! Rolling him in flour?”
(This is when I spit coffee.) “No, pervy. I’m talking about stuffing Harvey.”
Kristen insisted, “You can’t leave the room talking about sex and come back talking about gluten-free sausage!”
She did have an excellent point. But, just to finish the story, I went to Mother’s Market and found some gluten-free sausage. (I swear you can find anything in that place.)
I made the planned meal but, in retrospect, Harvey was simply too epic to be stuffed. He shoulda been bronzed. Here’s his magnificence in pictures…
And I think I know what question you’re dying to ask me…
What the hell do you fertilize that garden with, Jenny?!
Am I right?
Do you have conversations like this? Are you a gardener? Do you have any other ways to use gigantic zucchini besides stuffing them? Enquiring minds LOVE to know these things here at More Cowbell!